Regulus: A Lifetime of Irony
by Cassiopeia I of House Black
Summary: Sirius was there to catch him – and Regulus didn't fall.


**DISCLAIMER: I don't own any of the characters mentioned in the fanfic; all the rights belong to their rightful owners, e.g. J. K. Rowling.**

 **. . .**

 **Hello there,**

 **First time publishing in this site, so I'm kind of nervous already, especially with this fandom. I've been writing stuff for HP awhile now, and have accumulated a rather unhealthy headcanons on most background characters. Have a go at the story and tell me if you liked it or not! That would be extremly helpful to me. And apologies already if some things don't make sense, I'm writing from my own headcanons.**

 **With further ado!**

 **WARNING: mentions/allusions - of incest as well as hints/allusion of/to sexual assault.**

* * *

' _Filthy blood-traitor,' His mother screamed at Sirius angrily._

 _After all, he was a Black and Blacks were ought to be pure._

. . .

"Pure," His mother rocked Regulus gently to sleep.

After all, he was a Black and Blacks were always pure.

. . .

" _What do we have here?" Andromeda had nearly dangled Regulus by his collar as she caught him snooping around. He didn't mean to stumble on them as he explored their Noble and Most Ancient manor and nor did he mean to catch Lucius and Elijah kissing each other heatedly._

" _It's okay for boys to kiss boys," Lucius had told him when he noticed the fear and confusion within Regulus' eyes. "Love is love."_

" _And do you love him?" Regulus gripped had his hand and tugged on it._

" _Yes, I do love him." Lucius had smiled at the younger boy before him._

 _Years later and Lucius kills Elijah in order to protect little Theodore Nott from his father's blows._

. . .

"Regulus," Barty whispered to him fearfully. "We can't do this. It's wrong, so wrong for a boy to kiss another boy."

"It's okay for boys to kiss boys," Regulus whispered back, echoing the words told to him long ago. "Love is love."

"And do you love me?" Barty gripped his hair and tugged it closer, so close that Regulus could feel the breath of the other boy on his lips.

"I could love you," Regulus smiled at the younger boy before him.

Years later and Barty is the one who tells the Dark Lord about Regulus' death without any remorse.

. . .

" _The bloodline must prevail."_

 _And Andromeda had laughed as his mother kissed her forehead in an almost loving gesture and his father glared at Elijah Nott for daring to ask Andromeda's hand in marriage._

. . .

"The child will be a bastard!"

And Andromeda had screamed loudly as his mother burned her off the family tree and his father destroyed uncle Alphard for his seed that was growing in Andromeda's womb.

. . .

" _It is your duty to this family to continue its bloodline." Their father had beamed proudly._

 _And Regulus had watched, intrigued by the gleam of the ring on Sirius' finger. To him, it had seemed that Sirius was cackling with the power and might of their ancient blood._

 _Bellatrix had grinned and kissed Sirius on the cheek roughly, leaving behind a hint of blush and eyes that were too bright._

 _Narcissa had stood next to him, holding his hand snuggly and Regulus felt giddy. Andromeda had smiled genuinely at Sirius and Bellatrix for the first time._

 _The five of them were bound to each other._

. . .

"It is your duty now," his father grunted tiredly.

The ancient priceless ring felt heavy on his finger. The weight of purity and madness combined was far too hefty burden for a young boy.

Narcissa had smiled widely and kissed his cheek tenderly in congratulation but there was an air of dread surrounding her; and Bellatrix' gaze had felt like acid. Months later, Sirius had glared at him in school when he saw the ring and Andromeda never found out.

The five of them were broken beyond repair.

. . .

" _You look beautiful,"_

 _Regulus was seated at the foot of the bed in the room, Narcissa's head resting on his thigh and they both watched as Bellatrix twirled before the dusty mirror. The crystals of her wedding gown gleamed and oozed the darkness of her soul. Her fingers had traced her lips in the forgotten touch of a loving kiss. And her grey eyes betrayed the yearning she was trying to hide._

" _By the end of the day, I will be a Lestrange." She had whispered and her grey eyes—so much like Sirius'—found theirs and she laughed tearfully. "I should've been a Black – I should've been his…"_

 _And both Narcissa and Regulus had held her tightly as she wept because it was her last day as a Black._

. . .

"You look beautiful,"

Regulus was seated at the foot of another bed in another room, his hand is resting on his thigh and he watched as Narcissa twirled before the clear mirror. The lace of her wedding gown emitted light and whispered of purity at its finest. Her palm rested over her heart as she tried to calm it to no avail. And her blue eyes betrayed the fear she was trying to hide.

"By the end of the day, I will be a Malfoy." Her eyes found his and she smiled, "I've been waiting for this so long."

And Regulus kissed her languidly one last time because it was her last day as a Black.

(She should've been his)

. . .

"What do you think love would feel like?" Cissa had once asked him with wide blue eyes and bruised lips.

Regulus thought of his mother and father, both deranged and blissfully content in their madness. He thought of Andromeda's tears (and the baby in her belly) and uncle Alphard's screams of agony. He thought of Bellatrix's laughter and Sirius' grey eyes and their demons that were waiting to be unleashed.

He shook his head in sadness. "It's a manifestation of madness—"

But Regulus also thought of Barty's endless green eyes and his scarred-skin and butterfly kisses. He thought of Lucius' smile as he had looked at Narcissa. And he thought of his uncle Cygnus and aunt Druella, buried side-by-side, with not even death keeping them apart.

"—but it's everlasting!"

. . .

" _Muggleborns deserve magic," Sirius had shouted and their mother had slapped him forcefully in a whirlwind of screams and angry tears._

. . .

"Muggleborns deserve death," Regulus had declared and his dark lord marked his skin in a whirlwind of pain and destruction.

. . .

" _Reggie," Sirius had gripped his shirt tightly. "Please brother of mine!"_

. . .

"Regulus," Sirius had gripped his neck tightly. "You are no brother of mine!"

. . .

" _Don't you dare leave us! Don't you dare leave me…For family, Sirius. Please stay—" Bellatrix shouted sharply and kept punching Sirius' chest, bruising his bare chest with her fists. Sirius had been shaking violently and grabbed her in a bloody kiss of clashing tongue and teeth._

" _This family is death and ashes," Sirius had begged her, "Please, let me live."_

 _It was the first time he ever saw Bellatrix cry._

. . .

"For family, Reggie—" Bellatrix whispered softly and gathered him into her arms, covering his naked flesh with her cloak. Regulus shuddered painfully as her fingers touched bruises and cuts. "—We do everything for family."

"The dark lord tasted like acid and everything evil and inhuman." Regulus sobbed, his body aching and his mouth full of blood. His blood. He felt filthy and dirty. "Please, let me die."

It was the third, and last, time he saw Bellatrix cry.

. . .

" _Sirius," Little Regulus squealed in joy as he mounted his broom for the first time towards the heavens up above. "I'm flying!"_

 _Sirius was there to catch him – and Regulus didn't fall._

. . .

"Sirius," 18 years old Regulus screamed in tears as the Inferi dragged him down to the depth of hell down below. "I'm falling!"

Sirius wasn't there to catch him – and Regulus fell.

* * *

 **So I hope you've enjoyed the fic as much as I enjoyed writing it. There's something utterly tragic with the Black children, a sence of hopelessness surronding them I suppose. I have yet to read Half-blood Prince and DH but from OoTP, I've been in love with the Black family.**

 **They are damnably addictive and I already know I'm going hell.**

 **C.B.**


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